My yahoo messenger account is full of two things… spam and slutty bots…

F*cking spam… and spamsexbots…

While Yuuki is touring Turkey, I am pretty bored on my own. So in search of companionship I turn to the spambots that flood my Yahoo messenger…

Looks like Jabba’s palace…

This isn’t the first conversation I’ve had with them…

imogenefrancoisc883 : hey cutie

Me: hkjh

imogenefrancoisc883 : have we chatted before?? im 24/f u ?

Me: jghjhf

imogenefrancoisc883 : i’m sorry … i get to be forgetful at times!! how’re you?

Me: hgjfbnfb?

imogenefrancoisc883 : Just finished taking a bath..long day been kind of busy but i’m feeling a little naughty now! so what’s up?? … want to have some fun?

Me: Let’s do role play!!

imogenefrancoisc883 : long day i was in the shower forever just playin around and it always gets me horny lolz .. gonna change my clothes want to see ?  lol

Me: i’ll be captain planet! have you been polluting lately?

imogenefrancoisc883 : i need someone that can make me squirt .. you ever made a girl squirt before lolz?

Me: if by girl you mean a plugged geyser that I used my magical eco friendly powers on then yes… also dolphins…

imogenefrancoisc883 : wanna play on cam ??

Me: the world is too dirty for me to sit and play

imogenefrancoisc883 : dirty can be good 🙂

Me: no… it’s the exact thing that I use my powers to fight, in fact if i get dirty then my powers weaken and i become just a really gay looking cos player…

Why do super heroes wear their undies outside their pants… wait… is he even wearing pants?

imogenefrancoisc883 : dirty can be good 🙂

Me: dirt and grime are part of the pollution that… wait… dirt isn’t pollution… what the hell sort of super hero am I?

imogenefrancoisc883 : click the gold ‘Join Free’ tab at the top of my profile…k, then fill out ur info ….give it a second to load ..when you get in, I’d love for you to join me private …k?

Me: and what about the kid with the heart ring… how worthless do you have to be to end up with the “love” ring…

imogenefrancoisc883 : i use this site to play on cuz i don’t want to be recorded ! …this site doesn’t allow users to record my webcam! you know?

Me: i can use quicktime’s screen record function to record anything that’s displayed on my high resolution screen… bitch…

imogenefrancoisc883 : make me your bitch 🙂

Me: hmmm… captain planet is interested… by-the -by my real name is Sanchez… my skin tone is due to the fact that I’m albino and addicted to drinking luminescent paint… so, as my bitch i command you to fetch my slippers and then retrieve this tennis ball… let me know when you need to go out… god help me if you tinkle on the rug… i’m Korean you know i’ll f*cking eat you!!

imogenefrancoisc883 : 🙂

Me: yes… Captain Planet is korean… surprise… it shouldn’t be a surprise, i look like a cheap japanese anime knock off…

imogenefrancoisc883 : credit card verifies your age, you’ll get in for free thru my page but you need to verify that you’re an adult …can’t show ass and pussy to minors .. u know?

Me: hmmmm… well if they’re trapped in a mine it might be difficult… of course you could lower some fiber optic cable down… maybe some instructions on setting up a network… are caves 3G?

imogenefrancoisc883 : let me know when you’re done or if you need help …i’ll be gettin’ ready for you ..K ? 🙂

Me: what sort of preparations? are we going to role play? I’m already captain planet… hmmmm…. well OK… I’m in, I’ll be the Joker… not the Dark Knight Joker… the Jack Nicholson creepy date rape joker…

imogenefrancoisc883 : k ur good let me know when you’re in babe.. it’ll send you right to my cam once you’re done

Me: i’m a cop

imogenefrancoisc883 : are you in yet ?

Me: i’m a chicken

imogenefrancoisc883 : well hey better give me some “gold” when you’re on the site’s like a flirt and I’d love some from you ..k?

Me: i’m a level 42 paladin wizard… i have no need for gold! I can make gold from old cheese using alchemy!!!

imogenefrancoisc883 : k

Me: you are wise to surrender to the will of I captain planet the lvl 42 gold minting paladin wizard! i cast eyes of penile magnification and begin a fire sword meditation

imogenefrancoisc883 : k

Me: you’re not into this are you?

imogenefrancoisc883 : what’s taking u soooo long babe im burnin’ in here waiting for u …..

Me: ohhhh… my spell casting is starting to have its effect! i cast level 5 sorority girl inebriation spell! and of course don my robe and wizard hat

Me: the robe is too hot and the hat looks gay

Me: i remove both

Me: now i’m just in my really retarded looking captain planet outfit

Me: we stare into each other’s eyes

Me: you whisper… “You never loved me…”

Me: soft tears fall from my eyes

Me: “I’m sorry…” i stammer, the wind wails against the rocks

Me: good bye imogen

Me: may we meet again

Me: in this world or the next…

end scene

When you start me up…

2 thoughts on “Role Playing with a Sexbot 2.0

  1. well I did LOL a few times. I don’t think my imagination goes that far. Although my roommate is also in Turkey. But he’s from there and just went for a month to visit his family.

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