My Vampire Memory

I remember when vampires were badass.

Was a big step for minorities when we were finally able to become vampires!

I remember when vampires were cool.

I remember when vampires were hot.

I remember when Selma Hayek had big boobs... wait...

I remember when vampires were all three at the same time.

I would let Selene suck my... blood...

And unfortunately I remember when vampires were none of these things…

What the f@ck? He's not even wearing Ray-bans!
I actually tried watching this movie... we need to come up with a word to describe things that are much worse than "terrible."

Thankfully, this trailer makes me once again like vampires!

Bless you Kate Beckinsale